Don't ever use Schick Quattro Titanium

It's as if I shaved my face with sandpaper. Laced with glass. And throw a bit of turpentine on there as well. Might as well. It would have been less painful.

And just so everyone knows, like most men on the face of this earth who shave, I tend to shave fairly quick. All those times I watched Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, the shaving part never stuck in my head. They say to shave slow... but I'm on the road to the fast lane. The hell with slow shaving!

But back to the devil's razor. As I was getting ready for a night of fun times with friends for my birthday, I lather my face up with the usual gel that foams up. It's always amazed me. I feel like a cat with a ball of string. I put on the water, making sure it's right before it scalds. And I take the razor out, as if it would be my Excalibur. But as I did the first scrape down my cheek, I felt a pain I haven't felt in quite some time. I made me bleed my own blood.

Not once. Not twice. But roughly 14 times. On my face. The moneymaker. How could I do that to myself? And it's not that I don't like Schick. I've used Schick for years. My last razor was another Schick razor. Another one with 4 blades. And didn't cut myself once. So I'm thinking Schick decided they liked being a pain in the face and made a razor only sadists and masochists would prefer.

I like that.

SCHICK RAZORS! A Pain in the FACE!!

Ok, time for some sushi.

-J a m e s